(From archived blog, circa Valentine’s Day 2017.)


I have had numerous friends tell me that their mantra for 2017 is simply going to be “LOVE.”


Coincidence? I think not. I think this is awesome! It means our collective consciousness is moving, it is heightening! 


And today, on all days of the year, we connect with loved ones to share this great passionate thing we all have inside of us. 


It is love.


It is all we are at our core. 


It is what we crave from others. It is our singular reigning request from our universe. Our treatment of this truth can either create our biggest internal void or our absolute ecstasy. Because our entire perception of what we see outside of ourselves is predicated by what is already happening within us.


Therefore, if we want love, we must give ourselves love first. We cannot give what we don’t have. If you are running low on your own self-love tank you cannot give high-quality, boundless love to others. You cannot be selfless until your self needs are met first. 


We wish and we try and we tug and we push to make it the other way around. I see it everyday. But it does not work like this, and it never will :-/


A wise man told me once that if you listen to any conversation, the following is all that is ever really being said:


“Love me. 

Love me? 

Now do you love me? 

Does this make you love me? 

How can I get you to love me? 

Do you love me now? 

Please, love me.”


It doesn’t matter if it is a professional conversation or a personal one. Seriously, test this out for yourself. Listen to people talk. You will see that it’s true. 


There is no better day than on this day, sweet Valentine’s Day, to show ourselves love. If that means doing something and pampering yourself in some way, okay go for it. But remember, you do not need anything to love yourself. Everything you need is already inside of you. I’m serious. Stop trying to fill your perceived void with stuff and things and events. You are complete already, you are whole, and there is so, so much of you to love. About 37.2 trillion cells to be exact. 


Be the best lover you can be today by loving yourself first. My humble suggestion on how to do so, you can take or leave it: 


Find 10 minutes and head to a quiet corner where you will not be disturbed for this brief time. Sit or lie, and breathe. Close your eyes and just follow your breath. Inhale. Exhale. 


Slowly, list 5 things in your head that you love about yourself. They can be anything, as all are welcome in this space. Go over each one fully, relishing in the beauty and goodness of each trait. Continue to focus on your slow inhales and exhales. Enjoy your breath. Enjoy your thoughts.


If you find your mind reaching for things that you do not like about yourself, just allow those frustrations to breathe too, without judgment, then gently return back to your list of 5 lovely things.


When you feel you are finished, open your eyes and continue on with your day or evening. You will feel loved, and the world around you may feel a bit softer, a little bit kinder, a little less threatening or invasive. You may feel a little more whole than you did 10 minutes ago, and a bit more peaceful perhaps.


And it will all be coming from you. You showed up and filled that space. Not anyone or anything else. 


You did that. And that my friend, is true power. 


That my love, is what love can really do. 


I love you. Happy Valentine’s Day. :)


– Lian